Sportswag Moving!!

We're getting a full-on real site. It's still under construcshe, but if you want to take a peek: www.sportswag.org
Hit it up! There's nothing there yet, but soon it'll be your favorite workplace diversion. For now, keep coming here everyday for goodness of all kind. Today's been slow (and I've been busy at work), but in general there's goodness...
Thanks to Au; loyal contributor, good Catholic, and snappy dresser, for setting us up with new digs.

Greatest Video Footage In History?

Thank you, thank you, thank you, is all I can say to The Painted Area for posting this golden video of JRich humiliating Boozer in the Rook-Soph game a few years ago. As a Clevelander living in San Fran, there is nothing more satisfying than seeing Carlos Loozer get pwned, by a Warrior no less (even if he was still a Cav at the time). I can't believe the crowd didn't erupt and rush the court, And1 style, after a play like this. Enjoy:

Cavs Usher in Another Playoff Victory

Previously I blogged about Jay-Z's involvement with the New Jersey Nets, so in the interest of full disclosure, it is worth noting that Usher is a minority owner of the Cleveland Cavs.


I would also be clapping if I owned part of the Cavs. Every player on the Cavs starting five logged double digits in game two, and LeBron James was truly on fire, scoring 32 points and contributing 12 assists. The Cavs continue to dominate the offensive boards and second chance points with the help of Anderson Varejao, who finished with 6 offensive rebounds.

The Nets didn't help their cause - Jason Kidd had 8 turnovers, which equals the number of turnovers the Cavs roster combined. Ultimately, the Cavs shot the ball 21 times more than New Jersey, so even though the Nets were shooting around 51% from the field, the Cavs come away with the win. In case you're feeling sorry for Kidd, remember that he is an alleged wife beater.

Now the series moves to New Jersey. I previously predicted a Cavs win in six, but I would like to revise that to five, maybe even four. It isn't out of the realm of possibility that Cleveland will steal one of the Nets two home games away from them, and if it is game three then I expect the Nets to be demoralized and worn out in game four.

Local News: Run SteJax, Run!

TrueHoop noticed something in my own local paper, the SF Chronicle, that I missed. Probably because I don't read that commie rag too religiously (read: at all). It's kind of sad how much I don't pay attention to local news (that commie comment was just to make me feel better... and they are a bunch of pinkos).
At any rate, for those of you linkophobes who didn't click above, the gist of the article is that Stephen Jackson has a court date on Thursday. Remember when he fired his gun in public last summer? You don't? Maybe that's because winning a playoff series makes people forget a lot of things.
So he has a game in Utah Wednesday, a court date in Indiana Thursday, and another game in California Friday. Essentially SteJax is gonna need a court sanctioned delay (or continuance for all you Boston Legal fans) or a jury full of Warriors fans in order to not miss Game 3. And should he be swiftly found guilty, he could be missing even more time. Like 3 to 5 years...
There's a wind of uncertainty blowing through the Bay Area today...

A Burner's Sill Owns Rust

Yeah, that's an anagram for Bulls, Warriors, Suns, Nets. Call it a 2nd round losergram. A burner's sill owns rust.
The Bulls went down 2-0, but I still cling to the belief that this one's going 7 games. The Baby Bulls shot like 30% from the field last night. That won't happen in Chicago. As soon as they rediscover their stroke, this will be an interesting series. I promise.
The Nets didn't look bad against your favorite and mine, the Cavs. But that's all part of Bronski's plan. He's like the giant spider from the Lord of the Rings, except the spider probably would have made a funnier Sprite commercial. Only a few places bothered to pick up on the fact that it's now been over a month since the last time the Cavs lost a game. They may not be setting the world on fire, but they'll be mighty rested when it comes time to go toe to toe with the Detroit bad boys.
The Spurs are a bunch of hard assed, stone cold, killing machines. Just meat and potatoes. The Suns gave it their best shot, but there's no beating Timmy. Duncan's like the house in Vegas. Sure you'll win a bet here and there, but in the end, as the saying goes, the house always wins. The Spurs in the playoffs are like Dolph Lundgren in Universal Soldier. Although Manu Ginobili is unlikely to make a necklace out of the Spurs ears at the end of this series...
The Warriors are just about the only game 1 loser that walked away looking like they won. Utah's only hope was to walk into game 1 and slaughter the Warriors. That would've been the only way to stop the momentum. Instead they walked in and made it clear to the Warriors that the dream continues. If you thought Oracle Arena was bumping for round 1, just wait 'til you see the city of Oakland in round 2. We are gonna shake the building. The Jazz are good, but they've got no chance in Oakland, and now Golden State knows they can win in Salt Lake City.
So in review: Bulls will lose, Nets will lose, Suns will lose, Warriors will win.
A Burner's Sill Owns Rust... think about it. It's better than A Boner's Slur Swirls Nuts.

Pistons Firing on All Cylinders

Ho-ly sheet! The Pistons play against the Bulls demonstrates they are in no mood for a repeat of their performance against the Cavs in the second round of the NBA Playoffs last year. Yes, Detroit beat Cleveland in the second round, but it was in a grueling seven game series that left them weakened to the eventual champs, the Miami Heat.

I know I said the Pistons would win this series, but can I revise the "in seven" part of my prediction? Chris Webber hits 10 out of 11 shots for 91 % FG, which sets a new team record, and I'm left wondering if Chicago can recover...

There is a glimmer of hope - these first two games played out more or less how I expected - Detroit won games one and two at home. Now it's time to pack it up and fly across Lake Michigan for a showdown in the windy city. The Bulls have been knocked down a peg or two, but the ball is in their court now.

I feel bad for Chicago, I've been sitting here pouring over their roster, and they really don't have the pieces to complete the puzzle. When two big men coming off the bench, Tyrus Thomas (18 pts) and Andres Nocioni (12 pts), score more point than your starting guards, Ben Gordon (13 pts) and Kurt Hinrich (2 pts), you are not going to win. Hell, Thomas alone scored more points than the starting guards.

For Chicago to win, it is going to take more than their big men. It is going to take their entire team. I know it is cliche, but spread the court!

Detroit is so complete, so well polished on both ends of the court, so veteran, so fundamental. The Pistons have taken away all of the momentum the Bulls had charging into the second round after sweeping the Heat. I fully expect a better showing from the Bulls when they play in Chicago, because to be honest, how could it be much worse?

Monday Biz

First, big thanks to GasFace for his guest bloggerizing of the Swag. We got straight gassed, son. Stay tuned for more from the Gas one, as the Bulls-Pistons and Cavs-Nets series' unfold.

Next, after yesterday's Phoenix v. San Antone melee, there can be no doubt Steve Nash is the league's MVP. Either him or TDuncs, but whichever one of them it is, it sure as hell isn't Dirk "Early Exit" Nowitzki. In fact, watching Nash play through a Rocky Balboa-like bleeder on his face just makes the handing of the MVP to Dirk that much more of a joke.

Don't be fooled by the Pistons' game 1 shellacking of Chicago. This is still gonna be a hell of a series. The Bulls needed a game to find their sea legs. Now that they got that one out of their system, I'm expecting them to give the Pistons fits at home and hell on the road. This baby's going to 7 games. I like the Pistons to defend their home court and come out on top.

Cavs baby, Cavs. We didn't look magical, but Bronny gets the job done. That's all we need. We can ride the King all the way to the big show if we play our cards right. Look for the Cavs to dominate the match ups they can control. Nobody expects Larry Hughes to light the world on fire against J-Kidd, and Bronny on Jefferson or Carter isn't exactly a dream come true on defense for the Cavs. But Z, Gooden and Varejao should all have their ways with Miki Moore, Josh Boone and Jason Collins. I'm also looking to Eric Snow for a big defensive and experience push for Cleveland. He did it last year for the Cavs against the Wizards.

Shed a tear for TMac. I can't believe Utah stole this one. I knew it would be a tough series, and Utah's no bunch of slouches, but how does a team with Mac and Yao (not to mention Shane Batty) not get out of the first round? Either way this spells good news for the Warriors, I think. The Jazz are an excellent defensive team, but I feel like Yao would have absolutely eaten the Warriors alive in the paint. I don't think Golden State would have been able to play "small ball" against the Rockets. They should be right in their wheel house against the Jazz' 3 forward-2 guard lineup.
We still believe, Bay Area, don't let the fire die down. We can ride this wave of momentum all the way into a West Finals blood bath with San Antone or Phoenix.

Nets-Cavs: Dynasty vs. Dynasty

Back in 2004 Bruce Ratner bought the NJ Nets for $300 with the help of an investment team that included Jay-Z .

Make no mistake, this new management team has been making power moves. As well as I thought Jason Kidd meshed with Kenyon Martin, there is no doubt that Vince Carter is leagues better. Jason Kidd, Vince Carter and Richard Jefferson are an East coast version of the Phoenix Sun's run and gun style of play.

I have a feeling that Larry Hughes and Sasha Pavlovic are not suited defensively to play against Kidd and Jefferson, so I expect to see E. Snow and Anderson Varejao to produce some solid minutes off the bench. The Cavs have an advantage with their big man, Zydrunas Ilgauskas, who averaged a double-double during the regular season - watch for the first play of the game to be Z. down and inside on the basket. Lebron James and Vince Carter should be playing each other up and down the court. That's the match-up to watch.


Speaking of LeBron, this is the sort of image that causes the hearts of Cleveland fans to stop for a moment.

For now Cleveland can breath a collective sigh of relief, since LeBron is locked into his contract for a few more years. But if the Jigga man moves the Nets to Brooklyn like he plans to do and Cleveland doesn't close the deal by the end of LeBron's contract...well, I got 99 Problems...

In any case, Cavs win this series in six to advance to the conference finals.

Can the Motor City Compete with Bullpower?

First, a tip of the hat to the Cap'n for the invite and congrats to his Warriors for their surprising and dramatic upset over the Mavs. Game 6 was one of those games that reaches beyond NBA fans. Even if someone doesn't watch basketball, all you have to do is tell them about Stephen Jackson's seven three-pointers or Baron Davis balling out with a pulled hamstring and they suddenly share the excitement of the game.

BUT TODAY IS PISTON-BULLS. So that's what we will be talking about. Game one tips off very shortly, and Detroit has home court advantage. The Bulls are coming off a tremendous series against the defending world champs. Not only beating the Heat, but sweeping them. However, the Pistons are an entirely different team.

Not to detract from the Bulls victory over Miami, but D. Wade was coming back from an injury and Shaq is getting old. The Bulls will have some serious competition with the Pistons. Every single game is going to be hard fought. But when it is all said and done, I'm going to have to say Detroit wins it in seven games.

Just the fact that I said the Bulls will have some serious competition with the Pistons (instead of saying the Pistons will have some serious competition with the Bulls) shows how much of a threat the Bulls are. The Pistons better watch their backs. Ben Wallace took a piece of Detroit's championship dreams when he moved to Chicago - and he has shared it with his teammates. It's going to come down to the strongest starting line-up in the East vs. the deepest team in the East. So crack open a cold one, sit back, and enjoy the ride because this should be the start of a beautiful rivalry.

WE'VE DONE IT!!

Yes we! Bay Area fans are the 6th man of this squad. We just humiliated the Mavericks. It's on!! Next round here we come!! Go Warriors!!!!!!!!

Incidentally, as the game was ending just now on TNT, Cuban said something angry to the camera as he passed by. It was inaudible, any lip readers with Tivo, get on this.

WARRRRRRRRRIORS

6 and a half minutes to go, Warriors up 21.

The Bay Area is about to explode. Make no mistake, after this game wraps up in about 15 or 20 minutes, we will take to the streets.
Lock up your daughters, lock up your wife. Lock up your back door and run for your life.
When I finally calm down, I'll get in depth about the greatest playoff upset in history.
The City is back.

Nice Change of Pace?

I suppose this would count as the first of the coming wave of football posts. As you loyal Swagites well know, the only sports we really enjoy to the fullest here at Sport Swag are basketball and football. And since the basketball season will finally be coming to an end soon enough, we will fill our days with football news and nonsense. Here's the first; file it under nonsense... extremely homoerotic nonsense.


Of course this came from With Leather, and of course we couldn't resist. This is the new face of our beloved Browns, and that's his hand on his friend's beloved wang. I guess it's a nice change of pace from all the ass slapping he does as a football player. Although I reckon if he tries to change the genitalia patting paradigm from back to front, he'll find resistance.
Violent, ass whooping resistance.

Blargh! That Dude Got Jacked Up!

Another slice of life (death?) from With Leather. Lacrosse is a painfully boring sport, but hits like this would go along way to getting the sport off public access and on a more respectable channel... like Spike TV.

Suns and Spurs

No shocks here. Suns and Spurs finish off the ill deserving Nuggs and Lackeys. Kobe's a punk. Nash is a gamer, the true MVP. Spurs Suns is about to be an excellent series. Tomorrow night, Bay Area get ready...

Brendan Haywood: Unemployed Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Nameplate

Brendan Haywood didn't play a single minute in Game 4 and left the bench area before the buzzer sounded. He was also the first Wizard out of the locker room. To make his future in Washington even more of a long shot, the nameplate above his locker stall already was missing when reporters filed in for post game comments. Washington Post

What the hell is the deal? First Telfair gets fired via locker nameplate removal, now Haywood too. Since when did the nameplate become a status symbol? I have a nameplate on my desk at work, I still don't make shit.
Okay I'm lying, I don't have a nameplate...
But Brendan Haywood and Sebastian Telfair don't either, so that puts me in pretty mediocre company. In fact, those two guys are like the Mellon and Rockefeller of mediocre.
I'm a mediocrity baron.

Matt Barnes: It's Getting Ugly in Here

When asked about relations between the Mavs and Warriors, Matty Barnes had this to say (from Mercury News):

"The bottom line is, we don't like each other," Warriors forward Matt Barnes said. "We don't like them, they don't like us. It's going to get chippy, there's going to be hard fouls and that's the way we like to play."

I love this kind of mean spirited trash talk. Matt Barnes deserves special recognition for how he's played in this series. He's been phenomenal. Clearly Baron is the MVP, but Barnes has been the lightning rod, the intangibles factory, and the clutch-shot machine for the Warriors.
Add tattooed, ass whooping, Dirk dominating, destroyer to that list.

Cuban: Crazy or Right?

Part of me loves Mark Cuban. His fire, his money, his team, the fact that he's one of a small handful of owners who look like they genuinely love the game and want their teams to win beyond profits.
The other part of me wants to punch this whiny, spoiled, entitled, chubby faced, goatee-sporting assbag right in his man-boobs.

When he bitched and moaned about a referee against Dallas, I ignored it as the crybabying of a rich punk. But the refs have done everything in their power to hand this series to the Mavs. Last night Baron got a 6th foul on a no-contact play and, moments later, Stephen Jackson was ejected for what appeared to be absolutely nothing. This all handed the Warriors legendary victory right to Dallas.

But it doesn't phase me.

No, the Warriors will not be stopped by such foolishness. Tomorrow in Oakland, Baron and the boys are gonna TCB.

Okay, enough posturing. I don't think there's a "conspiracy," of any kind, but it's just clear; Golden State has Dallas' number, and the refs don't know how to play it. They're either calling fouls at the worst possible time, for no reason, or they're letting the guys play knock down, drag out ball with no calls in the early going.

I wish we could just let them play.

If the foul doesn't clearly alter the play, keep your damn hands off the whistle. It always ends up looking like the refs were out to screw the losers when their calls end up deciding the game.

So no, Cuban's not right. And he's also not crazy. But he clearly wasn't complaining after the refs gift wrapped game 5 for him last night.

WARRIORS

It's good to live in the Bay Area. Baron Davis, Matt Barnes, Stephen Jackson, Mickael Pietrus are legends. 5:49 to go in the fourth quarter of game 5. Warriors up a point and they have the ball. Is history about to be made?


UPDATE: The answer is no. history will have to wait for thursday night in Oakland...

Understandable

Apologies to Nathaniel Friedman on my Slate rant yesterday. He commented on the blog, and I re-read his article. I still don't quite "agree," but I can see where he's going with it. I really kind of misunderstood it when I read it yesterday.
He's not advocating a shortening from the standpoint of someone who obsesses over basketball (me), but rather the "casual fan." And I can understand that most fans don't go home from work and park in front of the tube for 6 straight hours of Ernie, Charles, Kenny and the playoffs... everyday. And most of them don't play in 3 fantasy leagues and follow the stats and as many games as possible, all year, for all the teams. Additionally, I'd imagine, most of them don't know what the PER is, or the +/-, or why you should never listen to what Bill Walton is saying. (Even as I write this, I start to wonder; am I watching too much? The answer is no.)
So for them (being the vast majority of fans), I understand why he preferred the best-of-5 first round to the best-of-7, and he does actually make a good point about how more than half the league makes the playoffs. That doesn't really seem right when you think about it. Still, maybe it would just be better if we added an additional round or three, and just included all the rest of the teams...
Can you say 1 seed vs. 15 seed? 4 months of playoffs? 80 games in 80 nights? Lordy, that would be kick ass...

Slate's Idea of a "Sports Nut"

Apparently Slate, the respected online magazine, thinks a "sports nut," is someone who encourages you not to follow sports. This is Nathaniel Friedman. And this is what he thinks about the NBA playoffs. (Hat tip to GasFace for bringing this to my attention)
I'm shocked frankly, because I think he's also one of the guys behind FreeDarko which is a sweet blog.
He opens it up with a jaw dropper:

Even the most die-hard basketball fans think that the NBA playoffs are too long.

I'm a die-hard fan. I hang out with a few die-hard fans, and I read a bunch of other die-hard fans. And I'm being 100% honest when I tell you, I've never heard even a single one of them lament the length of the NBA Playoffs. Friedman raises a good point about the length and arduous nature of the playoffs, or "second season." But true "die-hard fans" get revved up by that. This is my favorite time of year. Now a good argument can be made to shorten the regular season. By shortening the grueling 82 game regular season, the players would be fresher, and therefore the post season would be more exciting, with a higher level of play.
Loving basketball as much as I do, I wish they'd just make the damn thing year round and add more games, but I see the wisdom in a proposed shortening of the regular season. But the playoffs are where the best games happen! The best players get to show their best stuff and we get to watch all of it! Proposing to cut that short is heresy.
Friedman continues with a comparison to football and baseball that attempts to illustrate why you should just watch part of the game (maybe the most asinine concept I've ever heard of...). All it does is illustrate why basketball is the greatest sport on earth. The game doesn't stop every 2 seconds, there are no long periods of guys just standing around. That's not a bad thing, that's one of the reasons basketball is both an action game, and a thinking man's game.
But if you're in a hurry, and looking for summaries, here's one: skip Friedman's article, close your laptop, watch every minute of playoffs basketball you can, celebrate the Cavs' victories with alcohol.
(And the congregation says) Amen.