According to the Chicago Tribune, Scottie Pippen is coming back to the NBA. As a coach? As a GM? As a mascot? Nope. He's back to play. Pip says he wants to play for a contender, and at the age of 41, apparently there's no shortage of teams ready to give him a shot. Imagine my shock when the Cavs were listed as the 2nd or 3rd most likely to land the legend. Of course the Bulls are in the mix, and the Lakers have to be strong contenders. Oddly I have this strange feeling he might end up in Utah. Don't ask me why, I just have this premonish. Pippen claims he's in the best shape he's been in 5 years. Well, 5 years ago he was washed up. But I'd still love to see him return and make a difference for someone... just not the Cavs. The last thing we need is to stick a piece of gum on the leak in our ship. Why have Pip play Point Forward when we could have Bron just do it himself. If we're giving up on the hunt for a true point guard, I'd rather see Bron bring it up or even Hughes. Let's see how it all pans out.
Progs: Pippen gets signed by the Jazz: Pippen flourishes, playing about 15-20 minutes per night and lending much needed leadership and age to the Jazz. Sloan falls in love with him and cuts Deron Williams. Jazz get knocked out in the Conference Finals by either Phoenix, San Antonio or Dallas.
Pippen gets signed by the Cavs: Cavs go on a 24 game losing streak, miss the playoffs and Pippen re-retires.
Pippen gets signed by the Bulls: They still can't beat the Cavs, Pistons, Heat or Wizards in the playoffs.
Pippen gets signed by the Lakers: Pippen flourishes, Lakers get knocked out in the Conference Semi Finals by either the Jazz, Suns, Spurs, Mavs or Rockets... but they do take it to 7 games.
Friday, February 16, 2007
Thursday, February 15, 2007
The Tale Of The Tape
Today's post will be about the upcoming run off between reigning bag of bones Dick Bavetta and Master of the Classless, Charles Barkley. Let's face it people, they are both old, out of the game, and deserve to be retired. Not to retire, but be retired by somebody else.
Bavetta has been a personal bane of mine for a while now. His failing eyesight and slow reaction time have caused multiple teams to be expelled in the playoffs, not to mention the multiple atrocities committed upon the regular season.
Barkley, another personal bane, will not give the Cavs any credit, no matter what their record, who plays for them, or what kinda of hope they bring to Cleveland.
The call?
It's so hard to pick one over the other given that I hate them both so much. If Dwyane Wade was on the ticket, I'd pick him to lose, but I don't have that luxury. Instead here is my pick:
Barkley wins the contest in 15 minutes (for a mere 235 feet). 7 Minutes in (before either hits the far baseline) Bavetta is distracted when somebody glances in Dwyane Wade's direction. He runs away from the course to call the non-existent foul, completely forgetting he's in a race, drawn to the mystical non-foulness of DWade. Barkley tries to capitalize, yet falls and breaks both knees, after Kevin Johnson preemptively greased his side of the floor. Bavetta and Barkley both crawl to the finish line, only to have Bavetta's heart fail. Barkley wins in a gain for us all, Bavetta is dead, never to judge anyone or anything again. Barkley is humbled by the experience becoming a hermit for the rest of his life.
Let's all pray for this,
Slop
Bavetta has been a personal bane of mine for a while now. His failing eyesight and slow reaction time have caused multiple teams to be expelled in the playoffs, not to mention the multiple atrocities committed upon the regular season.
Barkley, another personal bane, will not give the Cavs any credit, no matter what their record, who plays for them, or what kinda of hope they bring to Cleveland.
The call?
It's so hard to pick one over the other given that I hate them both so much. If Dwyane Wade was on the ticket, I'd pick him to lose, but I don't have that luxury. Instead here is my pick:
Barkley wins the contest in 15 minutes (for a mere 235 feet). 7 Minutes in (before either hits the far baseline) Bavetta is distracted when somebody glances in Dwyane Wade's direction. He runs away from the course to call the non-existent foul, completely forgetting he's in a race, drawn to the mystical non-foulness of DWade. Barkley tries to capitalize, yet falls and breaks both knees, after Kevin Johnson preemptively greased his side of the floor. Bavetta and Barkley both crawl to the finish line, only to have Bavetta's heart fail. Barkley wins in a gain for us all, Bavetta is dead, never to judge anyone or anything again. Barkley is humbled by the experience becoming a hermit for the rest of his life.
Let's all pray for this,
Slop
Dunk Contest
Since I ramped up to how much I loved Amare's dunks in '05, here's a great recap video of the whole contest. And holy crap, Josh Smith knows how to dunk a ball.
Dwight Howard
I know this is a week late, but since it was pretty much the sickest game winner I've ever seen, I had to post the video.
For some reason, people think he won't be ridiculous in the dunk competish. Personally I can't wait to see what he's got up his sleeve. If it's anything even half as awesome and innovative as Amare's dunks from 2 years ago, it'll be a show. I also wouldn't mind a shattered backboard.
For some reason, people think he won't be ridiculous in the dunk competish. Personally I can't wait to see what he's got up his sleeve. If it's anything even half as awesome and innovative as Amare's dunks from 2 years ago, it'll be a show. I also wouldn't mind a shattered backboard.
Tim Hardaway is a Jackhole
Hardaway said some pretty awful stuff about gay people on a radio show yesterday. Tim Hardaway is a moron. I also have the distinct feeling that the only gay dudes he's ever seen are the dudes on Will and Grace. Which may explain why he's not more afraid of pissing off the gay community. He should come visit San Francisco some time. Living here has re-enforced one thing more than anything about homosexuals; there are as many different types of gay dude, as there are gay dudes. He should take a stroll down the Castro here in SF, and maybe get the beating of a lifetime from one of the many musclebound ass-kickers, who happen to be gay, who frequent the neighborhood. Maybe he could try out his, "Well, you know, I hate gay people, so I let it be known. I don't like gay people and I don't like to be around gay people. I am homophobic. I don't like it. It shouldn't be in the world or in the United States. So yeah, I don't like it." See how that goes over. I'd give my right nut to see Tim Hardaway try the killer crossover on a killer crossdresser from the Bay Area. I have a feeling he'd get his ass stomped. Kind of like his last comeback attempt. If this dude hadn't dished the rock so beautifully to Chris Mullin, he'd already be written off as a scumbag. Well allow me; Tim Hardaway's a scumbag.
Beyond Priceless: the Pwning of Mencia
This is a rare non-sports post. It just warmed my heart so much, I had to share it with you.
I have never been a huge fan of Joe Rogan as an actor. When he was on that crappy short lived comedy about the baseball team, Hardball, it was all just painfully awful. I loved News Radio, but he was the worst character on it, and that's saying a lot. Andy Dick was on that show. The Man Show lost whatever tiny bit of funniness it had when he took over, although it could've been that assbag Doug Stanhope. I have heard that he is funny as a stand up comedian, I have never seen it, but it's gotta be better than his acting. Carlos Mencia on the other hand is just 100% awful. That dude is the flat out worst comedian who's ever been. His show sucks, his stand up sucks, everything about him sucks. Ironically, he's not a bad actor, he was pretty good in this 1 episode of The Shield. At any rate, I hate Mencia. He's garbage, and you just have to watch this video, as Rogan absolutely demolishes Mencia on stage. Apparently Mencia's a joke thief, and Rogan conclusively proves it right in front of everyone. Mencia looks like he's gonna cry. Imagine Earl Boykins and Nate Robinson playing 2 on 2 with LeBron and KG. Priceless.
I have never been a huge fan of Joe Rogan as an actor. When he was on that crappy short lived comedy about the baseball team, Hardball, it was all just painfully awful. I loved News Radio, but he was the worst character on it, and that's saying a lot. Andy Dick was on that show. The Man Show lost whatever tiny bit of funniness it had when he took over, although it could've been that assbag Doug Stanhope. I have heard that he is funny as a stand up comedian, I have never seen it, but it's gotta be better than his acting. Carlos Mencia on the other hand is just 100% awful. That dude is the flat out worst comedian who's ever been. His show sucks, his stand up sucks, everything about him sucks. Ironically, he's not a bad actor, he was pretty good in this 1 episode of The Shield. At any rate, I hate Mencia. He's garbage, and you just have to watch this video, as Rogan absolutely demolishes Mencia on stage. Apparently Mencia's a joke thief, and Rogan conclusively proves it right in front of everyone. Mencia looks like he's gonna cry. Imagine Earl Boykins and Nate Robinson playing 2 on 2 with LeBron and KG. Priceless.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Meaningless Conjecture
I am into appeasement. Au, our only loyal reader, requested this, and I am ready to appease. Consider me the France of bloggers. Au pondered if Z's personal reasons for skipping the Cavs coming road trip are related to the fact that the Cavs would probably trade him for three twinkies and a roll of nickles at this point, as if anyone would ever offer that much. Harsh? Maybe. And I love Big Z, but for +9 mil a year he can get busy on the boards or get busy on my nuts. That may have been crude and blunt, but you don't want a 44Mil albatross around yer neck only to find that the "start" of his rapid decline is like the deepest valley of Shaq's decline. Z went from All-Star, to elite non-allstar Big Man, to waiver wire fodder like he was Erick Dampier after signing a contract. And Damp's post money decline was so fast he went back in time and got to prevent his parents from not meeting and falling in love. So here are some possible trade opportunes for the Cavs to unload the most famous Z since the Gay Blade (that isn't a homophobic dig, it's a movie reference you gutter-minded illiterates...):
1. Z and Drew Gooden to Minnesota for KG
More precisely; Z, Drew Gooden, Sasha Pavlovic, Scot Pollard, David Wesley, Dwayne Jones and Ira Newble to Minnesota for KG and Marko Jaric.
Why it works: On the face this looks like a total rip off for the Wolves, but step back and think about it. KG's gonna force a trade this off season, so what do they want out of it? It's rebuilding time, so they want to shave payroll, bring in a prospect or two and unload disgruntled employees with big contracts, but not to division (or even conference) rivals. In this they've found a perfect mate in the Cavs. We give them Pollard, Jones and Newble, (all in expiring contracts) which is like a free 6 million dollar write off. They get Wesley, cheap & with only one year to go on his contract, and still a potential contributor. They get Sasha, a budding prospect, but also in an expiring deal, so they can either re-sign or set him free for additional loot. They get back 2 very marketable and accomplished Big men in Z and Goodies for a 7 million dollar discount on KG and they get to unload one of their 3 disgruntled and expensive point guards. Actually the most expensive and disgruntled of the three, at that, in Marko Jaric. For the Cavs trouble, they get locked up in pricey contracts unto the apocalypse, but they also get to sport the 2 best players in the world, and get an upgrade at the point who can play and cover multiple positions. Granted, not the dream return on one of the greatest players to ever play the game, but it's better than being forced to dish him for another ultra expensive star who won't get them any closer to contention.
Chances it'll happen: 1/1,000,000,000
2. Z and Larry Hughes for Jason Kidd and Jason Collins
Why it works: This one is way less insane, I'd even describe it as a real possibility. New Jersey is looking to unload JKidd, despite the fact that he's never been better. Marcus Williams looks like he's gonna pan out, and 2 more years at over 40Mil is a lot to swallow for the aging Kidd. With Vinsanity also possibly about to opt out, Larry Hughes becomes massively more enticing to them, not to mention Z being the big man they're desperate for. As a cherry on top, they get to unload Collins, who is a deadbeat, and an expensive one to boot. For the Cavs, the upside is obvious; we upgrade from a bunch of deadbeats at PG to arguably the greatest man to ever run the point. If Bron and Kidd can't go all the way together, than they just weren't meant to be champs.
Chances it'll happen: 1/1,000
3. Z, DGoods & Larry Hughes---> Pau & Mike Miller---> Channing Frye & Jam Crawford
To be more precise: Cavs send Z to Memphis, Gooden & Hughes to New York. Memphis sends Pau and Miller to Cleveland, Brian Cardinal to New York. Knicks send Frye and Jerome James to Cleveland, Crawford, Jared Jeffries and Kelvin Cato to Memphis.
Why it works: Cavs get the best out of the deal, of course, getting Pau, Frye & Mike Miller, instantly becoming favorites to win it all. In the process we unload Gooden, Hughes and Z, and the only downside is we have to take on dead beat Jerome James. Memphis gets to downgrade from the vicious Pau at +12mil for the next 4 years, to Z at 10mil for the next 3. They also get Crawford, who I feel could actually breakout in Memphis, all by his lonesome. Memphis also gets to unload their worst contract, Cardinal at +5 mil for Jeffries, a superior player for the same price. They also get Cato, who they can release at the end of the season and save another million. The Knicks get a massive face lift, getting Gooden and Hughes, who would immediately replace Frye and Crawdaddy. They get to unload James (chump) but they do have to take on Cardinal (chump). So basically the Knicks break even, Memphis makes baby steps and the Cavs win it all. I like it.
Chances it'll happen: 1/1,000,967,854,567
1. Z and Drew Gooden to Minnesota for KG
More precisely; Z, Drew Gooden, Sasha Pavlovic, Scot Pollard, David Wesley, Dwayne Jones and Ira Newble to Minnesota for KG and Marko Jaric.
Why it works: On the face this looks like a total rip off for the Wolves, but step back and think about it. KG's gonna force a trade this off season, so what do they want out of it? It's rebuilding time, so they want to shave payroll, bring in a prospect or two and unload disgruntled employees with big contracts, but not to division (or even conference) rivals. In this they've found a perfect mate in the Cavs. We give them Pollard, Jones and Newble, (all in expiring contracts) which is like a free 6 million dollar write off. They get Wesley, cheap & with only one year to go on his contract, and still a potential contributor. They get Sasha, a budding prospect, but also in an expiring deal, so they can either re-sign or set him free for additional loot. They get back 2 very marketable and accomplished Big men in Z and Goodies for a 7 million dollar discount on KG and they get to unload one of their 3 disgruntled and expensive point guards. Actually the most expensive and disgruntled of the three, at that, in Marko Jaric. For the Cavs trouble, they get locked up in pricey contracts unto the apocalypse, but they also get to sport the 2 best players in the world, and get an upgrade at the point who can play and cover multiple positions. Granted, not the dream return on one of the greatest players to ever play the game, but it's better than being forced to dish him for another ultra expensive star who won't get them any closer to contention.
Chances it'll happen: 1/1,000,000,000
2. Z and Larry Hughes for Jason Kidd and Jason Collins
Why it works: This one is way less insane, I'd even describe it as a real possibility. New Jersey is looking to unload JKidd, despite the fact that he's never been better. Marcus Williams looks like he's gonna pan out, and 2 more years at over 40Mil is a lot to swallow for the aging Kidd. With Vinsanity also possibly about to opt out, Larry Hughes becomes massively more enticing to them, not to mention Z being the big man they're desperate for. As a cherry on top, they get to unload Collins, who is a deadbeat, and an expensive one to boot. For the Cavs, the upside is obvious; we upgrade from a bunch of deadbeats at PG to arguably the greatest man to ever run the point. If Bron and Kidd can't go all the way together, than they just weren't meant to be champs.
Chances it'll happen: 1/1,000
3. Z, DGoods & Larry Hughes---> Pau & Mike Miller---> Channing Frye & Jam Crawford
To be more precise: Cavs send Z to Memphis, Gooden & Hughes to New York. Memphis sends Pau and Miller to Cleveland, Brian Cardinal to New York. Knicks send Frye and Jerome James to Cleveland, Crawford, Jared Jeffries and Kelvin Cato to Memphis.
Why it works: Cavs get the best out of the deal, of course, getting Pau, Frye & Mike Miller, instantly becoming favorites to win it all. In the process we unload Gooden, Hughes and Z, and the only downside is we have to take on dead beat Jerome James. Memphis gets to downgrade from the vicious Pau at +12mil for the next 4 years, to Z at 10mil for the next 3. They also get Crawford, who I feel could actually breakout in Memphis, all by his lonesome. Memphis also gets to unload their worst contract, Cardinal at +5 mil for Jeffries, a superior player for the same price. They also get Cato, who they can release at the end of the season and save another million. The Knicks get a massive face lift, getting Gooden and Hughes, who would immediately replace Frye and Crawdaddy. They get to unload James (chump) but they do have to take on Cardinal (chump). So basically the Knicks break even, Memphis makes baby steps and the Cavs win it all. I like it.
Chances it'll happen: 1/1,000,967,854,567
Melvin Ely to the Spurs
Imagine my shock when this trade, Ely for Eric Williams and a 2008 2nd rounder, didn't send shockwaves through the league. Actually, this could be huge for Ely. Granted, nobody gets good minutes in San Antone, save for the big 3 (Duncan, Parker and Ginobes), but with Frankie Elson & Oh Boy Oberto underacheiving and nobody else with any size, Ely could be in for major minutes. And he's always responded well when given a look (see the last 2 years when Okafor spent more time on the bench than I did in JV Lacrosse).
Progs: Great steal for the Spurs in the short run. But don't be surprised when E Wills actually gets minutes in Charlotte (for some reason teams always think this guy is good...). And then definitely don't be surprised when Charlotte parlays the 2nd round pick into the next Gerald Wallace... In short, solid move for both teams.
Progs: Great steal for the Spurs in the short run. But don't be surprised when E Wills actually gets minutes in Charlotte (for some reason teams always think this guy is good...). And then definitely don't be surprised when Charlotte parlays the 2nd round pick into the next Gerald Wallace... In short, solid move for both teams.
Swag gets Tagged
Got a zap from my associate over at Sloppy All Around. He said I was "Tagged" and should write 6 personal things about myself and pass it on to 6 other bloggers. Well here you go Slopster...
1. I don't encourage, take part in or like people who perpetuate Chain Letters.
2. See #1
3. I don't know 6 bloggers, and I'm damn sure not forwarding this to Henry Abbott, Bill Simmons, the BasketBawful crew or Brian Windhorst.
4. I would wish this kind of obnoxious bullshit perpetrated on Gilbert Arenas and his probably retarded blog. But again, see #1.
5. I can't open my eyes under water.
6. I have to admit I do sort of find Nala (yes, the female lion from The Lion King) kind of hot. But in a strictly Jessica Rabbit sort of way, if you know what I mean...
So now I'm passing it on to all of you, my loyal Swagites. Write in to the Swag (ygalbot@gmail.com), or leave it in the comments section, with 6 personal things about you. You can leave it anonymous, or leave some personal info. I wanna hear your darkest secrets. C'mon, sidle up to the Cap'n and whisper in his ear...
1. I don't encourage, take part in or like people who perpetuate Chain Letters.
2. See #1
3. I don't know 6 bloggers, and I'm damn sure not forwarding this to Henry Abbott, Bill Simmons, the BasketBawful crew or Brian Windhorst.
4. I would wish this kind of obnoxious bullshit perpetrated on Gilbert Arenas and his probably retarded blog. But again, see #1.
5. I can't open my eyes under water.
6. I have to admit I do sort of find Nala (yes, the female lion from The Lion King) kind of hot. But in a strictly Jessica Rabbit sort of way, if you know what I mean...
So now I'm passing it on to all of you, my loyal Swagites. Write in to the Swag (ygalbot@gmail.com), or leave it in the comments section, with 6 personal things about you. You can leave it anonymous, or leave some personal info. I wanna hear your darkest secrets. C'mon, sidle up to the Cap'n and whisper in his ear...
C-Webb
I told you, didn't I? CWebb, despite his obvious shortcomings, was a great move for the Pistons. The bottom line, as I said at the time of the trade, is that the Pistons don't need Webb to motor up and down the floor, they just need him to rope in some boards, spread the defense, hit open shots and dish the rock at timely moments. Those are all things Webb has become an expert at. And not-too-surprisingly the Pistons are on fire and proving once again that they're the only real team in the East. News of they're demise was greatly exaggerated, and I fear come playoff time, the Cleveland faithful will once again be hearing that awful sound... "DE-TROIT BAS-KET-BALL!!"
Gilbert Arenas: Swagged!
Wow, the king of the douchebags promised 50, got 9 and then called out the one truly untouchable guy in Washington, Eddie Jordan. Fortunately Jordan absolutely owned Arenas. It was high time this jackass was put in his place. Hopefully Dirk will do it again next weekend in the 3 point competish. Promising to score a bunch of points against one of the coaches that cut you from the national team is just stupid. But if you're gonna do it, you better hope you come through on the promise, or at least have a solid game... or at the absolute least, win the damn game. Arenas did none of those things. The sting of this embarrassment should hopefully last through the playoffs.
Been Away
Sorry loyal Swaggers, I had a packed weekend. Had to play 2 shows, fix my computer and stop Two Face from robbing the First National Bank of Gotham and the Bank of America at the same time. Predictably enough it all came down to a situation where he was forced to flip a coin and I won. Don't worry though, the Cap'n's back in black!
Friday, February 9, 2007
correction
get my stud baller to d wade so everyone out there can drool at his stats (less TOs of course).
Obviously
Intuition just seems to keep whispering in my ear: "get this guy on every team immediately and don't look back"
This was a public service announcement. I'm not dead.
Thursday, February 8, 2007
If the Browns draft Brady Quinn or Troy Smith I will...
Absolutely go on a shooting spree. I'm talking rampage, blood, death, crying, the whole nine. The Browns need to draft 600 lb O-Line guys with every pick and hope 1 or 2 of them can be a competent blocker in the NFL. That or a Linebacker. Draftng offensive players out of college is the biggest crap shoot there is. If a guy is good enough to be a defensive stud in college, he will be solid in the NFL, the same does not go for WRs, RBs and QBs. The reason is that most High School defensive beasts get to college only to be turned into Wideouts and TEs, whereas if a guy is so beastly on D that he remains on D in college and can stop the flurry of physically gifted (but empty headed) college running backs and WRs, there's a much higher chance he'll be a baller in the pros. Ignore Mario what's-his-name from last year (which is not to say he's not solid, just not worth the #1 pick).
John Amaechi, JR Rider, Stephen Jackson
What do these three men have in common? Wait, let me rephrase that. One of these things is not like the other... Get it? Maybe not, I'm not talking about the fact that Amaechi sleeps with dudes. I'm talking about the fact that he's now the only one of the 3 with whom it will be consensual. That's right everybody, JR Rider's going to jail and SteJax is in court this April. I have a feeling they will both be calling an even bigger, meaner dude "daddy," in the near future. And to be honest, SteJax has always struck me as the kind of aggressive, homophobic, ass who might give a guy like Amaechi shit just 'cause he's gay. Rider has been in and out of trouble for years. Sad news. Amaechi however gets props for starting the trend. He's put the assholes of the league under the gun; start accepting, or start packing. Guys who are prejudiced against homosexuals will be outed and the bad PR will devastate their wallets. Just sit back and watch the assholes change their tunes. And then see if the league doesn't start airing games on Bravo in the next few years...
Wednesday, February 7, 2007
Cavs Rumblings
This from Cavs.com:
Danny Ferry: We have been, and will be, exploring the trade market to see if we can improve the ball club. If there is an opportunity that makes us better we will pull the trigger, but we're not going to make a trade just to mix things up.
This from the Chicago Tribune (they're referring to the Pau Gasol deal being mulled by Chitown and Memphis):
Actually, with Andres Nocioni out injured and uncertainty about how that might affect a deal, it's likely the teams will go searching for third parties looking to get involved, perhaps like Portland with Zach Randolph and Jamaal Magloire, the Nets with Vince Carter, the Cavs with Larry Hughes and Anderson Varajeo and the Magic with Grant Hill's expiring contract.
And this from me:
Danny Ferry's an ass. Mike Brown is a shitty head coach (though there's evidence to suggest he's a great assistant coach). Larry Hughes might as well hold a gun to Ferry's head, so his theft of 13 mil a year will be considered armed robbery and he'll get more respect in jail. If we end up in 3 team talks with the Bulls and Grizz and we don't walk away with a massive upgrade from Hughes (read: Luol Deng or Pau Gasol) we might as well fold the team and send Bronny packing for the big apple.
Interesting Factoids: Larry Hughes makes 1 million dollars more per year than Pau Gasol. Larry Hughes has webbed feat and he speaks fluent Klingon. Larry Hughes is so soft his only endorsement deals are from Ace Bandages, The Original Mattress Factory, and the company that makes Peeps (marshmallow chickens)
Danny Ferry: We have been, and will be, exploring the trade market to see if we can improve the ball club. If there is an opportunity that makes us better we will pull the trigger, but we're not going to make a trade just to mix things up.
This from the Chicago Tribune (they're referring to the Pau Gasol deal being mulled by Chitown and Memphis):
Actually, with Andres Nocioni out injured and uncertainty about how that might affect a deal, it's likely the teams will go searching for third parties looking to get involved, perhaps like Portland with Zach Randolph and Jamaal Magloire, the Nets with Vince Carter, the Cavs with Larry Hughes and Anderson Varajeo and the Magic with Grant Hill's expiring contract.
And this from me:
Danny Ferry's an ass. Mike Brown is a shitty head coach (though there's evidence to suggest he's a great assistant coach). Larry Hughes might as well hold a gun to Ferry's head, so his theft of 13 mil a year will be considered armed robbery and he'll get more respect in jail. If we end up in 3 team talks with the Bulls and Grizz and we don't walk away with a massive upgrade from Hughes (read: Luol Deng or Pau Gasol) we might as well fold the team and send Bronny packing for the big apple.
Interesting Factoids: Larry Hughes makes 1 million dollars more per year than Pau Gasol. Larry Hughes has webbed feat and he speaks fluent Klingon. Larry Hughes is so soft his only endorsement deals are from Ace Bandages, The Original Mattress Factory, and the company that makes Peeps (marshmallow chickens)
Tuesday, February 6, 2007
Update: Gilbert Arenas is Indeed a Dick.
And I still don't mean detective. Remember that video of Arenas acting like an assbutt during a 3 pt. challenge against teammate DeShawn Stevenson? I just posted it yesterday. Well peep this from the Washington Post (via HoopsHype):
DeShawn's thoughts about Gilbert at the time: "He kind of cheated me, everybody on the team said it. He was in my face. I think he was kind of scared I was gonna win. But you know, that's Gil. Gil's going to try to find a way to try to win. It was a tough loss....But he knows what he did, and I'm not talking to him right now.") Anyhow, I asked DeShawn this morning whether they were friends again, and he assured me that they were. "That's my boy, man," DeShawn said. "I could never get mad at Gil, man, that's my boy. You know, me and him are very competitive, so we're gonna go back at it." Washington Post / February 5
DeShawn's thoughts about Gilbert at the time: "He kind of cheated me, everybody on the team said it. He was in my face. I think he was kind of scared I was gonna win. But you know, that's Gil. Gil's going to try to find a way to try to win. It was a tough loss....But he knows what he did, and I'm not talking to him right now.") Anyhow, I asked DeShawn this morning whether they were friends again, and he assured me that they were. "That's my boy, man," DeShawn said. "I could never get mad at Gil, man, that's my boy. You know, me and him are very competitive, so we're gonna go back at it." Washington Post / February 5
I tried to interview DeShawn Stevenson and got a couple of things from him despite Gilbert's constant background chatter about how he took $20,000 from DeShawn in that shooting game the other day. Gilbert has now taken to calling DeShawn: "Second" as in he finished second. DeShawn simply calls Gilbert a cheater and pointed out that Gilbert didn't hesitate to hit him with a pass at the end of the first quarter when DeShawn drained a three-pointer. Washington Post
Monday, February 5, 2007
Finally The Dream is Realized (sarcasm)
Awesome Damon Jones gets an 83rd opportunity to embarrass the Cavs this season. I can't tell if Rip is saying that stuff in a pejorative tone. I hope so, 'cause Damon Jones is a jackass. Read these goodies from the Cleveland Plain Dealer (by way of HoopsHype):
The NBA will announce the field of 3-point shooters for the Feb. 17 contest later today, and according to league sources, Jones will be among a field that includes Dallas forward Dirk Nowitzki, who won the title last year over Washington's Gilbert Arenas and Seattle's Ray Allen in the final round. Pistons guard Rip Hamilton said Jones deserves a place in the competition.
With Jones in the contest, especially with the world watching, there is a good chance he will either say, do or wear something outrageous. This is the same player who wore a leopard sport coat during the postseason and a red velvet sport coat during last year's All-Star Game. "No matter what happens, he's going to be funny," Hamilton said. "I can't wait to see it. A lot of people in the league can't wait to see what he's going to do." Cleveland Plain Dealer
Gilbert Arenas is a Dick
And I don't mean detective. Here's some youtube video of him beating teammate Deshawn Stevenson in a 3 point shooting competish. Gilbert, shooting one handed, hits 73/100. But if you have a spare 10 minutes, watch Arenas act like a total jackass in trying to prevent Steve-O from hitting his shots. I can only hope that Deshawn took the opportunity to beat the snot out of Arenas in the locker room.
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